Another School Year in the Books, Naperville Principals Immediately Begin Pre-Pre-Service Week

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NAPERVILLE, IL — Just minutes after waving goodbye to students and high-fiving custodians over the last successfully administered MAP test, school leaders across Naperville quietly returned to their offices, opened their laptops, and launched into the district’s most cherished tradition: Pre-Pre-Service Week.

“I took a brief break to microwave some leftover cauliflower crust pizza,” said Cheryl Dunning, principal of Henson Creek Middle School, as she began drafting her seventh version of the staff retreat agenda. “But then I realized we haven’t updated the PLC norms since 2022. So I spent the next six hours on that.”

Administrators across the district reported feeling “refreshed and ready” to work 12-hour days organizing optional book studies no one asked for.

“I’m technically on vacation,” said Assistant Principal Jalen Mendoza, who was spotted on Zoom running a breakout session titled ‘Data-Driven Empathy.’ “But I’d rather stay sharp. Plus, my wife told me if I say ‘strategic alignment’ one more time at home, I have to sleep in the garage.”

This year’s Pre-Pre-Service theme — “Elevating Excellence Through Operational Elegance™” — was selected by Naperville’s new Department of Transformational Leadership Syntax and Staff Renewal, which also published a 63-page workbook explaining how to integrate “quantum listening” into team huddles.

Key district-wide priorities for the summer include:

• Redesigning all hallway bulletin boards to “reflect a growth-mindset-forward posture”

• Reimagining the student tardy process as a “Reflective Journey Framework”

• Replacing the school mascot with a more emotionally available marsupial

“Vision is everything,” said District Superintendent Dr. Hollis Everett, while livestreaming from an undisclosed leadership retreat called The Pedagogical Summit of Elevation. “Naperville doesn’t rest on its laurels. It sharpens them. Gently. Mindfully. Using evidence-based rubrics.”

Educators confirmed that each day of Pre-Pre-Service Week is color-coded and intentionally scheduled using a system called G.R.I.N.D.™ (Goal-Refined Instructional & Nurturing Design):

• 6:30 a.m. | Quiet panic in the parking lot

• 7:15 a.m. | Optional mindfulness breakfast with district consultants

• 8:00 a.m. | Collaborative Rebranding of Last Year’s Failures

• 10:00 a.m. | Back-to-Back PD Planning (Post-It Edition)

• 1:00 p.m. | Self-paced Google Slide Resurrection

• 3:00 p.m. | Strategic Crying (Solo, but documented in a shared doc)

Principal Dunning was last seen in the supply closet laminating copies of the 5-Year Vision Cycle Map while softly whispering:

“This time, they’re really going to buy in.”

Administrators are encouraged to laminate their takeaways.

🧨 Ruckus Roll Credits

(For educational use only. Do not laminate.)

This dispatch was filed by a principal who:

• Completed their 5-Year Vision Cycle Map entirely in Comic Sans

• Used ChatGPT to write their dating profile

• Led a “PD on the Go” session inside a moving elevator

• Once used restorative circles to process a broken laminator

• Accidentally scheduled three PDs at once and just called it “choice”

• Wrote a best-selling 17-page reflection on staff fridge etiquette

If you’re still reading, congratulations:

You’ve unlocked Level 3 of the Naperville G.R.I.N.D.™ Simulation Suite.

Please report to the faculty lounge for mandatory visionboarding, soft crying, and a gluten-free trust fall.

📎 Links You’ll Pretend to Bookmark and Actually Need

📌 Why You Can’t Unplug

→ Get into peak performance by mastering the fundamentals.

Required reading for anyone who packed PD books for vacation.

📌 The Anti-PD PD

→ How to Make Staff Development Not Suck

Warning: This may void your district’s preferred vendor contract.

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→ This Ruckus Maker Entry Plan Template

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And now, a few facts that may or may not be true:

• The word “synergy” has been outlawed in three states

• A principal in Coalinga, CA once laminated a vision statement so aggressively it set off a fire alarm

• Napoleon was not a licensed administrator, but still more strategic than your last PD

• Teachers have stopped reading staff memos at bullet point #3 since 1987

• Most principals don’t have a coach or mentor. Not because of budget cuts … but because no one told them that self-improvement is a leadership strategy, not a character flaw.

“You do not rise to the level of your onboarding slides. You fall to the level of your Google Drive folders.”

-Ruckus Maker Proverb

If you’re still here, you either:

• Forgot to close the tab,

• Can’t find the exit button, or

• Secretly love this chaos and want more.

Welcome to the deep end.

Now go forth. Mic off. Shoes optional.

Strategic plan still in Draft Mode.

Keep Making a Ruckus,

Danny

Published by Ruckus Makers — a division of Better Leaders Better Schools

Sponsored by Emotional Support Coffee™ – now fortified with district-level denial and lemon zest. Also available on Spotify.